First card free — no card required
GET YOURSELF
CARDED
Upload a photo, describe your hobbies and questionable qualities, and our AI draws you as a full 80s-style gross-out collector card — punny name, gag line and all.
Then grab a poster, tee + hoodie combo, or mug of your own ugly mug.
Put it on stuff
Hoodie, tee, mug, poster — every mockup below is a real card printed on real gear.
Black hoodie
$59
White tee
$39
Collector mug
$25
18 x 24 Full-Color Poster
$29
How the mess works
Upload your mug
One clear photo of your face. Phone selfie is perfect.
Spill your business
Hobbies, quirks, work drama, questionable qualities.
Sample description
“Runs the warehouse floor on a yellow Columbia cart, hollers "move, no overtime!", never met a breakfast taco he wouldn't eat mid-shift. Loud, lovable, ketchup-stained, allergic to slowing down.”
Get carded
AI draws the card, names your character and writes the gag.
Pick your pack
One Free Gross-Out
$0 forever
1 card
Upload a photo, spill your hobbies, get one card plus a basic description.
- • 1 AI-drawn card
- • Basic character description
- • Web-quality download
Collector
$5.99 per month
10 cards / month
Build a whole set of yourself, your crew and your coworkers.
- • 10 cards every month
- • Names, taglines & descriptions
- • Print-ready files
- • Merch discounts
Full Set
$59.99 per year
Unlimited cards
Unlimited cards and unlimited stock art for the year. Two months free.
- • Unlimited cards
- • Unlimited stock images
- • Print-ready files
- • Early access to merch drops
What you get in the box
18 x 24 Full-Color Poster
$29
Blow your card up huge on heavy poster stock. Full color, gallery-gross.
- • 18" x 24" full color
- • Heavyweight matte stock
- • Ships rolled in a tube
White Tee + Black Hoodie Combo
$59
Wear yourself. White tee and black hoodie, both printed with your card.
- • Cotton white tee
- • Heavyweight black hoodie
- • Both pieces, one price
Collector Mug
$25
11oz ceramic mug so your face stares back every morning.
- • 11oz ceramic
- • Dishwasher safe print
- • Wrap-around card art
Swipe or drag to browse poster, tee + hoodie, and mug examples.